Thursday, December 24, 2009

Dating...and stuff

Hmm...I've only been dating for 2.5 years (since I was married for six and with him for nine) and is anyone else with me when I say it is one of the most awkward things ever?! Really. I don't get this whole dating thing. You go out with a guy, you continue to see him for a few weeks... are you able to go out on a date with another guy or do you feel this obligation to just see this one dude? But...what if he is going out with other girls too and while I'm sitting at home feeling "obligated" he's out dating? Then what do you call each other? "Oh hi, this is uh..N, the uh, guy I'm dating.. wait, he's my "friend".. but we've been seeing each other..but we haven't committed to Yeah, so this is N." I don't get it. I try to get perspective on it from my guy friends and they all say conflicting things:

  • "Don't go out with this other guy if you really like the guy you're dating now."
  • "It is a NO-NO to date 2 guys at the same time."
  • "Yes, you're a player if you're dating one guy and you go out on a date with another."
And then the kicker..
  • "Who are these guy friends who are telling you this stuff? They're can go out with this other guy if you's only been a few weeks."
Geez, who the heck am I supposed to believe? Who makes up dating criteria? Is there a book that tells me what to do? A manual perhaps? Can I send in like 5 cereal box tops to get one? Let me tell you, I'm one smart cookie but being out and dating makes me feel so uncomfortable and ignorant...and I REALLY don't like feeling ignorant at all.

And then when I find out some of these guys haven't had a relationship in 5 years, I'm kind of puzzled. what is this then?! Do you finally want a relationship? Is this how it goes in your world? Date for a few weeks/months, then move on? What are you looking for? What are we doing?!

Yeah, dating completely has me puzzled.

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